Love Your Kids Unconditionally

One of the best ways to instill confidence and self-worth in your children is to provide them with unconditional love.   The security that they get from knowing that their parents love them no matter what is priceless.  Of course our children often behave poorly or do things we wish they wouldn’t, but it’s critical that we show them that we love them no matter what their behavior or accomplishments.  How can we as parents work to do this each and every day?

Tell them you love them.  Your children love to hear that you love them.  It’s music to their little ears.  Share your love for them with words morning, noon, and night.

Give hugs often.  The older your kids get the harder it is to get them to hug you back, but make the effort to show them physical affection whenever you can.

Listen.  When your children talk to you, be sure that you listen attentively to what they have to say.  If you ignore their efforts to reach out to you, then you may be sending them signals that your love has limits.  And that’s a message you don’t want them to hear.

Spend time together.  From fun activities like going to the park to less appealing chores like cleaning the garage, spending time together increases feelings of affection between family members.

Show love even when they misbehave. It’s pretty easy to express our love and affection when our child is making straight A’s and behaving perfectly.  But that’s not usually going to be the case!  It’s extra important that we tell our children that we love them when they have done something wrong.  Don’t get me wrong, they’ll still get put in time-out for throwing food at the dinner table, but sometime during that same night they’ll also get a good hug and an “I love you.”  It’s a lot harder to do this when they’re in trouble, but that’s when it’s most important to show them the true meaning of unconditional love.


  1. says

    Hi Polly,
    I found your site from the 31DBBB Challenge. I really like the overlook of your blog!

    What a great post especially for Valentines’s Day. I’m a single mom and lately I feel like I am doing what you said to not to in regards to listening. It’s not that I don’t listen, I just feel like I’m doing too many things at once, always telling them, “one second” or “I can’t right now I’m in the middle of something.” They are young 5 and 2 years and I don’t want this to be the beginning of them not coming to me later in life because they think I don’t care enough so why bother or what they are feeling or going through isn’t important to me. Thanks for the wake up call. This is something I need to definitely pay closer attention to.

    Thank you!

    • Polly says

      As a mom I know it’s something that I struggle with everyday! We are pulled in so many directions that it’s often easy to overlook our little ones when they want to talk to us. I do it all the time! It’s something we can all strive to do a better job of, me included. Thanks for stopping by and for your thoughtful comment!

  2. says

    Aloha Polly,
    A subject near and dear to my heart! I became a parent educator over 10 years ago because of my most challenging parenting job, my middle child! I am so grateful for what I learned in that class.

    My daughter is incredibly persistent, determined and focused. She used to drive me nuts! During my first “Redirecting Childrens Behavior” class, my teacher encouraged me to read “Raising Your Spirited Child”. Thanks goodness I did. My then 3 year old daughter became my hero from reading that book.

    She still pushes me to the limits, requiring me to fine tune my parenting skills, but I must say that she is still my hero, so even at the most difficult times, it’s still easy to love her unconditionally.

    Don’t you just love life? If you follow your intuition, you are guided to just the instruction you need, just when you need it most!

    I say that staying connected to your child is just as important as housing, clothing and feeding them!

    Stay connected to your child,
    Stay connected to your child,
    Stay connected work together,
    Stay connected to your child. (To the tune of Happy Birthday!)

    Many blessings,

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